Join powerful but over-it medium Madame Magenta and her husband Bernard on their run-ins with spirits, fae, and annoying dead exes.Madame Magenta, psychic, medium, and inventor of the ‘drink-along’ audiobook, reads her memoirs, with support from her adoring husband Bernard. In Season 1, Magenta is forced into a bank heist by the ghost of her ex-husband. Season 2 sees Magenta pitted against a psychotic murderer hell-bent on destroying the mystic community. In Season 3, they ward off a demonic entity living in an unlikely object. And in Season 4... we're on the case with Magenta & Bernard's Paranormal Investigations!Magenta also uses the ancient art...
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Sep 29, 2026 · 57:38
It’s definitely not a cult! Why do people keep saying that? It’s just another… CHARITY LIVESTREAM with Madame Magenta and Bernard! Songs! Fortunes! Good hangs! Money for good…
Sep 22, 2026 · 50:20
WATCH the recording of our London Podcast Festival live show on YouTube here! ---- It's been three weeks since the last charity live stream, but M&B are back! And this week, we…
Sep 1, 2026 · 54:29
Come and see Magenta & Bernard at the London Podcast Festival! AN AUDIENCE WITH MADAME MAGENTA (& BERNARD) - Sunday 6th September, 4:30pm, Kings Place London. Tap here to buy…
Aug 25, 2026 · 43:50
Come and see Magenta & Bernard at the London Podcast Festival! AN AUDIENCE WITH MADAME MAGENTA (& BERNARD) - Sunday 6th September, 4:30pm, Kings Place London. Tap here to buy…
Aug 11, 2026 · 55:46
Come and see Magenta & Bernard at the London Podcast Festival! AN AUDIENCE WITH MADAME MAGENTA (& BERNARD) - Sunday 6th September, 4:30pm, Kings Place London. Tap here to buy…
Aug 5, 2026 · 50:22
Come and see Magenta & Bernard at the London Podcast Festival! AN AUDIENCE WITH MADAME MAGENTA (& BERNARD) - Sunday 6th September, 4:30pm, Kings Place London. Tap here to buy…
Jul 29, 2026 · 1:39:37
Come and see Magenta & Bernard at the London Podcast Festival! AN AUDIENCE WITH MADAME MAGENTA (& BERNARD) - Sunday 6th September, 4:30pm, Kings Place London. Tap here to buy…
Jul 16, 2026 · 1:00:14
The pandas of the WWF get the M&B treatment! The treatment being: we raise some money for them. Head over to YouTube to hear Bernard's songs this week - Wild Thing (The Troggs)…
Jul 7, 2026 · 59:30
We're raising money for Greenpeace, and yeah, nah, yeah, this one has a lot of good Aussie accents mate? And we also invented a revolutionary (no pun intended) new air cooling…
Jun 30, 2026 · 53:02
It's the final instalment in M&B's Pride Month charity streams, and we're so close to hitting a £700 milestone... will we cross that threshold this episode? (Spoiler: yes,…
Jun 23, 2026 · 54:09
It's the second instalment in M&B's series of Pride Month live streams! This week, the funds raised were split evenly between 5 excellent charities: Say It Loud Club, AKT, LGBT…
Jun 12, 2026 · 59:20
It's the first of our Pride specials! Through the month of June, we'll be raising money for LGBTQIA+ charities. This week, the funds were split evenly between Stonewall,…
Jun 3, 2026 · 54:27
After a brief hiatus, M&B are back with more esoteric insights, toe-tapping tunes and rallying cries of rage in this era of late-stage capitalist chaos. Don't forget, you can…
May 12, 2026 · 53:36
It's another multi-charity special! Plenty of Muppet-talk in this week's stream, along with a pondering on whether Waterworld is a maligned classic, and some distinctly unhelpful…
May 5, 2026 · 49:07
Good Gollum, Miss Mollum! It's another M&B charity live stream, raising money for the PCRF - Palestine Children's Relief Fund. A very body-positive episode this week (with no…
Apr 28, 2026 · 49:31
On this week's episode of "half-remembered things and dubiously named British foodstuffs", M&B discuss the phenomena of Aunt Bessie's Yorkshire Puddings, the Fray Bentos Meaty…
Apr 21, 2026 · 51:49
Magenta spills the tea on her time as a Brownie, a Rainbow and other such curiously-named after-school cryptids. You can still support this week'd charity, UNICEF, by going to…
Apr 15, 2026 · 50:00
It's the second consecutive week of M&B's multi-charity extravaganza! Join us for more fortune-telling live stream goodness. Join us for the next one! Sunday 19th April, 8pm UK…
Apr 8, 2026 · 2:18
Here's the link to our Bandcamp page And here's the link to our Ko-fi page Hello, listeners! It’s us again. Hopefully you listened to our last message. If you didn’t, it was…
Apr 7, 2026 · 55:28
It's our first ever multi-charity live event! Viewers this week could donate to their charity of choice on our GiveWheel page, and we had donations to Amnesty International,…
Mar 31, 2026 · 53:32
It's another charity live stream! You know you want to listen and hear about Sir Patrick Moore's super sexy role in Cher's Burlesque musical. This week, M&B are raising money for…
Mar 26, 2026 · 50:36
Come join us for another Charity Live Stream! It's absolutely THICK with Thicc Witches. You can still donate to this week's charity, ActionAid, here And come join us for the next…
Mar 24, 2026 · 47:35
A slightly belated Live Stream! As usual, we've had to cut out Bernard's songs for copyright reasons, but there were a couple of real doozies in this stream, so head on over to…
Mar 10, 2026 · 59:44
It's a very bean-heavy episode, this one. Join us on Sunday March 15th for the next live stream! And you can still donate to this week's charity by visiting this link. See…
Mar 3, 2026 · 48:03
Magenta has been fighting a 2-day migraine, so she and Bernard are recording from a very esoterically dark room this week. But it hasn't dulled Mags' ability to tell fortunes,…
Feb 24, 2026 · 51:17
It's finally time for the Sagittarians to get their 2026 reading! Plus esoteric chat, a few misheard lyrics, and Bernard gets very angry about people who claim to like the…
Feb 20, 2026 · 55:44
It's time for Scorpio to get the Magenta Zodiac treatment! Come join us for the next livestream on Feb 22nd! You can watch it on YouTube here And if you want to support this…
Feb 3, 2026 · 53:50
It's time for Virgos and Librans to get the Magenta Zodiac treatment! Come join us for the next livestream on Feb 15th! You can watch it on YouTube here And if you want to…
Jan 28, 2026 · 50:08
We simply do not want to yuck anybody's yum! Come join us for next week's livestream on Feb 1st! You can watch it on YouTube here. And if you want to support this week's…
Jan 20, 2026 · 1:00:05
This episode's title actually appeared in the previous episode, but it's such an excellent joke that it warranted its own episode title. Join us for the next live stream! …
Jan 13, 2026 · 51:13
It's the first live stream of 2026, and M&B are hitting the ground running! With horoscopes for Pisces and Aries, a really excellent listener ghost story, and a new (perfect)…
Dec 30, 2025 · 55:06
It's time to wave goodbye to 2025, and beckon in the new year! With some (somewhat dubious) horoscope readings, which should, as always, be taken with a pinch of salt. We've…
Dec 24, 2025 · 1:01:37
Ho Ho Ho, Fans of the Esoteric, and welcome to Magenta and Bernard's Christmas/Festivus/Yule/Winter Solstice livestream, and it's a bumper long one. Perfect, one might say, for a…
Dec 9, 2025 · 38:36
Cat Neko wearing a delightful Christmas jumper turned out to be an incredibly distracting presence this week, but it was so worth it. You'll have to tune in next time to see him…
Dec 5, 2025 · 55:10
Neko the cat joins Magenta & Bernard for a special, calm, soothing instalment of the show. Picture a waterfall... WATCH THE NEXT LIVESTREAM ON YOUTUBE - 7 DEC DONATE HERE See…
Nov 25, 2025 · 38:21
Magenta & Bernard's weekly dose of absinthe-soaked, slow burn esoteric ramblings. Haunted phones! Typography jokes! Dropping a social hand grenade at your office Christmas party!…
Nov 18, 2025 · 35:20
M&B battle some gremlins this week on a quest to find out what the hell Jimmy Buffett is talking about. The next live stream will be on Sunday November 23rd at 8pm UK time (3pm…
Nov 15, 2025 · 37:12
Bernard has been trying his hand at Astral Planing, but listeners - we must advise against it. Astral Planing should only be done by a trained professional (ie Magenta). The next…
Nov 7, 2025 · 1:54
Hello, Laurence & Lindsay here. We've got a big problem, and we need your help. If you're listening to this on Spotify, we're asking you to stop, and switch to another podcast…
Nov 5, 2025 · 46:09
It's the Halloweeeeeeeen live stream! Recorded on October 31st 2025, and goodness me, what a lot of chaos there was on this one. The cocktail completely malfunctioned, and for…
Oct 21, 2025 · 51:52
What a week this was! We had cocktail based on a World War 2 ration pack, an abrupt expulsion of air, and a Pet Shop Boys number that you won’t get to hear because of copyright…
Oct 14, 2025 · 49:22
Possibly the bluest (meaning: dirty, rude, saucy) live stream M&B have perpetrated so far! What fun. Join us for our next live stream! It's on October 19th, 8pm UK time (3pm ET)…
Oct 7, 2025 · 27:48
A thin but savoury tasty treat awaits you in this week's Cocktail Time, along with deep dives on Mecca Bingo, why a sexy-scary dog might be the perfect Halloween costume for…
Sep 30, 2025 · 45:15
This episode sees the triumphant return of Cocktail Time, by popular listener demand! And a flurry of letters on such diverse topics as haunted wedding dresses, forcing your…
Sep 23, 2025 · 32:58
Can you spot people having affairs in bars? Is Professor Brian Cox gaslighting us? Is Ken Russell's The Lair Of The White Worm the greatest film you've never seen? Highlights…
Sep 9, 2025 · 30:22
Magenta and Bernard are back! It’s a new season of our chat podcast - with a twist! Because now it’s live! And for charity! From now on, M&B will be holding an almost-weekly live…
May 6, 2025 · 55:35
It's WHAM episode 6! (The last one) It's the SpOoOoOkY Halloween episode! This time, Mags and Bernie are making a kooky stop-motion adventure starring the Hungry Hungry Hippos -…
May 6, 2025 · 1:11:30
It's WHAM episode 5! This one came to Magenta in a dream... a SIDESCROLLER video game movie. Starring JASON STATHAM. If the left side of the screen catches up with him... HE…
May 6, 2025 · 1:14:06
It's WHAM episode 4! It's time to make a very respectful, very true-to-the-source-material, religious epic on a blockbuster scale! Magenta and Bernard are adapting The Book Of…
May 6, 2025 · 1:07:17
It's WHAM episode 3! It's a long one today! Because there's a lot to say about SYLVANIAN FAMILIES! Magenta and Bernard devise a dark, satirical horror movie starring the little…
May 6, 2025 · 34:10
It's the second episode of WHAM! Magenta and Bernard plan a new Hollywood smash, this time revolving around a GENERIC PUZZLE CUBE (definitely not affiliated with Rubik's Cube,…
May 6, 2025 · 35:55
It's WHAM episode 1! Join Magenta and Bernard for the first instalment of their movie podcast experiment. First in the spotlight - Polly Pocket . How can the tiny…
Jan 28, 2025 · 19:30
Read the Transcripts In this instalment of M&B's Paranormal Investigations: Mags, Bernie and Lindsay join forces with some unlikely allies in this, the final showdown of the…
Dec 30, 2024 · 15:01
Read the Transcripts In this instalment of M&B's Paranormal Investigations: A worrying phone call from Seraphina brings the coven back to Misty Moor Rectory... where all hell is,…
Oct 22, 2024 · 20:12
Read the Transcripts In this instalment of M&B's Paranormal Investigations: The youngest member of the coven, Lindsay, has fallen from a magical oak tree and broken her arm. So…
Aug 30, 2024 · 19:14
Read the Transcripts In this instalment of M&B's Paranormal Investigations: The third member of the coven - Magenta's mother Seraphina - is now living at Misty Moor Rectory (much…
Jul 12, 2024 · 20:51
Read the Transcripts In this instalment of M&B's Paranormal Investigations: It's time for Magenta and Bernard to start building their coven! First recruit - their elusive and…
May 31, 2024 · 16:03
Read the Transcripts In this instalment of M&B's Paranormal Investigations: Mags and Bernie deal with an uninvited house guest(s). Misty Moor Rectory is a strange and ancient…
Apr 5, 2024 · 15:47
Read the Transcripts Magenta and Bernard are off on their second adventure as M&B Paranormal Investigators, dealing with a client from their past - Margot Mockery. That's right!…
Feb 7, 2024 · 19:12
Read the Transcripts Join Magenta and Bernard as they wrangle a restless spirit on their first official adventure as M&B Paranormal Investigators! Are you ready to RAWWWWK?…
Jan 22, 2024 · 8:09
Read the Transcripts Magenta & Bernard are appearing on the long-running home renovation TV show GREAT DECISIONS! Host Kenneth McCrag joins M&B at their new residence - Misty…
Jan 13, 2024 · 35:32
Greetings, fans of the esoteric! And welcome to 2024! Magenta and Bernard are kicking off the year by solving a few problems sent in by listeners, with the esoteric guidance of…
Sep 15, 2023 · 50:47
Purchase the Madame Magenta Patented Decision Maker from our Ko-fi shop! Greetings, fans of the esoteric! It's a very special episode - recorded live from the London Podcast…
Mar 5, 2023 · 1:06:26
M&B are delighted be playing D&D! We now bring you the first in a two-episode campaign over at Dumbgeons & Dragons , an actual play podcast and fellow member of the Fable & Folly…
Feb 21, 2023 · 42:33
Subscribe to Magenta Presents now! Magenta and Bernard are back! First off, a couple of letters from Tragic Fans, and then the main event... We are thrilled to introduce our…
Nov 6, 2022 · 43:15
Buy a tea towel designed by Magenta! Greetings fans of the spooooooky esoteric! Due to an extraordinary scheduling error (Magenta and Bernard were accidentally using a calendar…
Sep 21, 2022 · 17:36
The exciting Season Finale! How will Mags and Bernie oust the demon Glandyform? Find out now! www.longcatmedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices…
Aug 25, 2022 · 23:57
Things are hotting up! Magenta, Bernard and Maybelline are finally coming face to face with the demon Glandyform. Will they be able to break the family curse at last? Find out in…
Aug 5, 2022 · 6:41
An update on the story from Magenta and Bernard! Enjoying the show? Support Mags and Bernie by buying one of their tea towels here ! www.longcatmedia.com Learn more about your ad…
Jul 28, 2022 · 21:35
Bernard and Magenta catch up with some letters! That's it, really. Buy a tea towel! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See Privacy Policy at…
Jul 2, 2022 · 11:09
An update on the story from Magenta and Bernard! Enjoying the show? Support Mags and Bernie by buying one of their tea towels here ! www.longcatmedia.com Learn more about your ad…
Jun 20, 2022 · 29:24
Magenta and Bernard catch up with letters sent in by you, the Tragic Fans! Buy Magenta's Esoteric Tea Towels! Beautifully screen printed tea towels are available from our Ko-fi…
Jun 10, 2022 · 12:20
Magenta and Bernard are back! After a bit of a hiatus, as Magenta's not been very well (full details in the episode), but they're committed to carrying on with this bloody story.…
Apr 13, 2022 · 39:52
Buy Magenta's Esoteric Tea Towels! Beautifully screen printed tea towels are available from our Ko-fi shop. Magenta and Bernard are back for more daring tales of adventure in the…
Mar 16, 2022 · 14:07
Magenta and Bernard are back for more daring tales of adventure in the mystic arts.... and to help you, the listeners! Our heroes have had a busy few months trying to deal with…
Mar 2, 2022 · 20:14
Magenta and Bernard are back for more daring tales of adventure in the mystic arts.... and to help you, the listeners! Our heroes have had a busy few months trying to deal with…
Feb 16, 2022 · 1:13:03
Something a bit different this time! Magenta and Bernard, did their first ever Twitch stream, and this is the audio from that very stream! They had people chatting away to them…
Feb 2, 2022 · 41:24
Magenta and Bernard are back for more daring tales of adventure in the mystic arts.... and to help you, the listeners! Our heroes have had a busy few months trying to deal with…
Jan 19, 2022 · 28:16
Magenta and Bernard are back for more daring tales of adventure in the mystic arts.... and to help you, the listeners! Our heroes have had a busy few months trying to deal with…
Jan 5, 2022 · 31:13
Magenta and Bernard are back for more daring tales of adventure in the mystic arts.... and to help you, the listeners! Our heroes have had a busy few months trying to deal with…
Dec 22, 2021 · 38:36
Magenta and Bernard are back for more daring tales of adventure in the mystic arts.... and to help you, the listeners! Our heroes have had a busy few months trying to deal with…
Dec 7, 2021 · 42:19
Magenta and Bernard are back for more daring tales of adventure in the mystic arts.... and to help you, the listeners! Our heroes have had a busy few months trying to deal with…
Aug 16, 2021 · 2:33
Quick - they don't have long! A few words from Magenta and Bernard... Support this podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See Privacy Policy at…
Feb 25, 2021 · 18:11
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Feb 22, 2021 · 11:11
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Feb 18, 2021 · 16:51
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Feb 15, 2021 · 24:35
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Feb 11, 2021 · 11:26
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Feb 8, 2021 · 19:24
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Feb 4, 2021 · 12:26
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Feb 1, 2021 · 17:37
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Jan 28, 2021 · 14:52
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Jan 25, 2021 · 14:59
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Jan 21, 2021 · 15:49
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Jan 18, 2021 · 17:16
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Jan 14, 2021 · 12:00
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Jan 11, 2021 · 14:20
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Jan 7, 2021 · 23:02
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Dec 31, 2020 · 10:36
Buy a coffee for Mags and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/ (www.longcatmedia.com) Greetings,…
Dec 28, 2020 · 24:41
A glimpse of 2021! Buy a coffee for Magenta and Bernard! http://www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia (www.ko-fi.com/longcatmedia) Find out more: http://www.longcatmedia.com/…
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