How Much Should We Share With Our Kids?

When is it useful for our kids to hear about our own life experiences—including situations caused by our own bad decision-making?

When does it become oversharing, or get too personal or inappropriate?

We discuss how to know how much to tell our kids, and how to have useful difficult conversations, including:


our own past choices around drinking, drugs, and sexual activity


the family secrets that may be part of our history


traumatic and difficult experiences: how do you get across what's important without giving a child information too heavy for them to hold?


divorce and family conflict: how not to recruit kids into taking sides of adult disagreements


serious illness of a parent, grandparent, or another loved one

Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode:



Our Fresh Take with Dr. Mary Martin

Lori Michas for Grown and Flown: How Much of Your Past Should You Share With Your Teen?

iMom Blog: How Much of Your Past Should You Share With Your Kids?

Lynne Meredith Golodner for MetroParent: Should Parents Tell Kids About Their Past?

Claire McCarthy for Harvard Medical School Blog: How to talk to children about the serious illness of a loved one


What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables.

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