When *You're* the One Who's Dysregulated

We talk a lot about how to manage kids when they are being impossible. But it's supposed to be the terrible twos, not the terrible forty-somethings. What do we do when we're the one in the family who's dysregulated?

In this episode, we discuss:


How to know if you're emotionally dysregulated

Why parents (especially moms) are particularly vulnerable

How dysregulation can show up both as anger and as shutdown

The connection between rumination, shame, and reactivity

How emotional dysregulation can become contagious in a household—and how calm can be contagious, too

Practical ways to reset when you feel triggered




Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode:


Cleveland Clinic: Emotional Dysregulation

Our Fresh Take with Erin Cox

Elif B. Koş Yalvaç et. al for Journal of Affective Disorders: Emotional dysregulation in adults: The influence of rumination and negative secondary appraisals of emotion


H.W. Koenigsberg for Journal of Personality Disorders: Affective instability: toward an integration of neuroscience and psychological perspectives


Rachel Schepke for PsyPost: Young children are more irritable when their mother has emotion regulation difficulties


Dominique Cave-Freeman, Vincent O. Mancini, et al for Journal of Personality and Individual Differences: Maternal Emotion Regulation and Early Childhood Irritability: The Role of Child Directed Emotion Regulation Strategies


Couples Therapy, Inc: Navigating a Marriage with an Emotionally Dysregulated Spouse


Rick Hanson et. al: Mother Nurture: A Mother's Guide to Health in Body, Mind, and Intimate Relationships





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mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, self-help for moms, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, parental stress, kids stress, emotional dysregulation in parents, parenting under stress, overwhelmed mom, reactive parenting, mom anger, yelling at kids, parental burnout, depleted mother syndrome, parenting anxiety, co-regulation, emotional regulation skills, parenting triggers, rumination and resentment, family emotional climate, repairing after yelling, parenting stress management, mom mental health, default parent stress, generational patterns parenting, managing big emotions as a parent
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