038: You’re Beautiful, I Don’t Want to Bone You, and That’s Fine with Audy Avery

The more polished title for this episode might be something like Audy Avery on Being Gray Ace, Gray Romantic, and Deeply Human -- but the one we landed on is probably more apt for this particular episode's vibe.

One of our favorite podcast guests is back! I got to sit down with one of my dearest humans, Audy Avery (they/them), and talk about something we don’t hear nearly enough about: asexuality and aromanticism, in all their layered, nuanced, and beautifully fluid forms. Rachael (she/her) popped in too (as she does), and honestly, it felt like a big warm return to the Empowerment Studio After Dark days -- the vibe was cozy, intimate, campfire-y. My favorite kind.

Audy shared their unfolding journey of realizing they’re on the ace and aro spectrums, and how that discovery has reshaped how they understand their body, their relationships, and their own self-consent. We talked about sex, the differences between libido and attraction, and the subtle but powerful ways we can show up more honestly in our desire -- or lack of it. I especially loved the part where Audy talked about being “romantic with life” and inviting others into that energy without needing to call it something traditional.

This conversation made space for a kind of radical softness -- for people who experience attraction differently, for those of us still unpacking purity culture, and for anyone exploring embodiment on their own timeline.

Whether you identify as ace or not, there’s something here for everyone -- a reminder that attraction, desire, and romance don’t need to follow a script. They can just be yours.

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