Episode 63 - Giving (and Receiving) Amends

Jackie and Denise tackle Step 9, exploring the nuances of making, and receiving amends. They discuss the importance of setting boundaries when an apology isn't genuine, the relief that comes from cleaning up your side of the street, and how "living amends" can rewrite your legacy over time.

Denise shares a powerful story about a Christmas Eve relapse and the amends that followed, while Jackie reflects on navigating uncomfortable friendship dynamics and learning to read the room. Plus, the hosts pitch an exciting new community "third space" and share their weekly self-care practices.

Ultimately, making a full repair in a relationship requires both extending and receiving grace. It’s crucial to recognize when an apology is actually just someone "taking your inventory," reminding listeners of the value of the restraint of pen and tongue.

Key Times:

00:02:15 Friendship dynamics: Jackie discusses the challenges of receiving amends and repairing relationships

00:08:00 Manipulative apologies: Denise shares a story about rejecting an insincere apology from her dad's ex-wife

00:12:38 The Big Book: Reading "The Promises" to ground the step work

00:16:20 A living amends: Denise's Christmas Eve relapse story and the lasting power of changed behavior

00:19:47 The restraint of pen and tongue: Avoiding reactions so you don't have to apologize later

00:21:41 Taking inventory: Defining what it actually means to "take someone's inventory" under the guise of an amends

00:34:48 Community building: Pitching a weekly Zoom "third space" for the podcast community to connect

00:40:09 Looking ahead: Teaser for Step 10, mindfulness, and the exhausting pressure of wellness culture

00:43:00 Weekly check-ins: Self-care practices and gratitude wrap-up

Topics Covered:

• Navigating the complexities and nuances of making and receiving amends in Step 9
• Setting boundaries against manipulative apologies and recognizing when someone is "taking your inventory"
• The power of "living amends" and proving apologies through consistent, changed behavior
• Practicing the restraint of pen and tongue to avoid creating new harms
• Pitching a new weekly virtual container and "third space" for the podcast community
• Weekly self-care check-ins and reading "The Promises" from the Big Book

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