Season 4, Episode 2 - Educator Martha Little on Belonging, Care and Immigration

Hospitality, Advocacy, Education and Community (Belonging) with Latina Martha Little of Kitsap County - "Anytime we have a conversation with, with someone, it's like, um, you are part of our family. You are part of us. And so we want to impart that, that wisdom and that love, because we want to, um, we want to ensure that we're all a family and we're all, you know, um, benefiting from, from each other."

Transcripts:

Danielle (02:22):

So, I, I wanted to just hear from you because every time I talk to you, there's like a little bits of wisdom in, in all the sentences. And I think that's true of most Latinas. Like, they start talking to you and they're like, By the way, let me give you this piece of really important advice,

Martha Little (02:37):

. Yeah. It's, it's our culture, right? Um, we are the, we are Tias to everyone. I mean, that's just, it is, is, um, anytime we have a conversation with, with someone, it's like, um, you are part of our family. You are part of us. And so we want to impart that, that wisdom and that love, because we want to, um, we want to ensure that we we're all a family and we're all, you know, um, benefiting from, from each other.

Danielle (03:08):

Right. And as a community member, I wonder if you would be willing to speak from your experience, Like, what are the aspects that make you feel belonging or maybe you, you, it's easier to speak to where you don't belong? I'm not sure .

Martha Little (03:22):

Um, you know, I think that, I mean, I could speak to both. Um, I think that, um, as the older I get, um, the more, um, the more comfortable I am with, um, presenting myself as fully as I am. Um, and so I think that, um, throughout my life, um, I, I was trying so hard not to assimilate, but to, um, I was trying so hard to, um, to have others like me and include me and, and to, um, and to build a space where, where I could show up as myself. And, um, and I just, it seemed like it didn't matter what I did, it just wasn't going to happen. And, um, and I realized that, um, you know, when my kids are, were in high school, and I can tell you a little bit more about that, but I came to this realization that, um, I was, I was perfect just the way I am.

Like, I don't need to change. I don't need to, um, to pretend to be something. I am not just to be included. And so, um, so I started showing up as myself. I started speaking my mind. I started, um, just being more, um, more outwardly Latina than I had been before. And, um, and I realized that, um, you know, the spaces that, that I was going into that maybe did not, did not feel like it was a space where I belonged, I, I started realizing that I had to say something. I had to, um, call it out and help them create a space for my, for me and for, for kids that I support and communities that I support. And so, um, I think that one, some of the things that, that organizations can do to create spaces where, um, where I can show up and feel like I belong in other, other community members like myself, um, is to, um, welcome us into the space.

I mean, just the smile and then acknowledgement that we have entered the space, um, because that's part of our culture is Latinos. I mean, it's that instant smile, Oh, like, what was that? And then, you know, we gravitate and we wanna touch, we wanna shake hands, or we wanna hug, we want to embrace. And, um, and so I think that, you know, white culture, this embracing sometimes is a little awkward. We have our little space bubble that we don't want people to, to cross. And, and we, and I can respect that most of us can, I, I feel, but, but even just that smile, that greeting that, Hey, how are you? Good to see you. Welcome. You know, that would be, um, number one is like, create a space instantly when the person walks in, greet them, um, and let them know that they're, that they're welcome in there.

And then also, um, you know, create a space where, where, um, people are allowed to show up as themselves and speak without criticism. Um, and so, and, and I'll give you an example. I was in a meeting once, um, where they were going over the, the, uh, meeting norms. And one of the norms was to, um, to monitor our, our voice level, our tone, and our body language. And I had to raise my hand and I said, Well, I need to leave then. And they said, What do you mean you're welcome here? And I said, No, that agreement right there tells me that I am not welcome if I have to monitor my body language, I am Latina. We speak with our hands, you know, we speak with our heads, we speak with our bodies. I mean, we get into this conversation, I said, And then, and then if I have to monitor my tone, if I have to monitor my voice, voice level, then I'm not gonna speak.

Because as a Latina, I tend to sometimes get very animated and my voice raises and that, and so, and so, they're like, Oh, oh no, that's not what we meant. What should that say then? And so, um, and so we work through that together as a team. And it took several meetings before we, we ca and I don't even remember where we landed, but it's, again, it's being, um, being aware that sometimes the, the norms or the expectations we have for that space, um, create, um, spaces where we don't feel welcomed, where we can't show up. So in that particular meeting, it, I had to show up as white to be, to feel like I belonged in there. I had to speak softly. I had to, um, sit with my body quiet. And, and that's not who I am. And not that I haven't done that in the past in order to succeed in, in, in this society I have. Um, but like I said earlier, I'm at a point now where it's like, I'm gonna show up as myself, and I'm gonna help you create spaces where I can show up as myself. Um, and so, you know, just, I don't know if you've experienced that through your life, where we've, the